Ducks in a Row

I used to be better at getting my ducks in a row.Before I had children.Before my ministry began to take me all over the world.Before social media.Back when it was just my magazine and I, I mostly had my ducks in a row.I loved the schedule of the magazine: Every day we knew what needed to happen on three different issues spanning three months. And almost without fail, those things happened. Ducks in a row.My husband was busy and years of singleness prepared him to take good care of himself. I had a schedule that, though quite full, worked for me. Our home never got too out of control with just the two of us. Ducks in a row.All that changed.A colicky baby who cried for four months, followed soon after by a second daughter, undid me. Schedule control disappeared. Order in the house seemed almost non-existent. My sense of identity and purpose abandoned me. Disarray prevailed as complexity intensified.My ducks were not in a row.The journey since then has been less about restoring symmetry and more about resting in God’s stability: We can make our own plans, but the Lord gives the right answer. (Proverbs 16:1)I am, however, a slow learner, and that journey has taken years. Intentionality and purpose have (mostly) replaced schedule and order.So my ducks may not be in a row anymore, but most of them know where they are going and are paddling steadily onward.